Slowing Down

Looking back on the first month after the girls were born, I remember going into the grocery store for the first time in weeks. I remember being stunned at how loud and stimulating "the outside" world was. I had been living my last month in "baby time" and never really venturing further than the hospital or my home, and sometimes even the baby's room.

The grocery store, a place I used to venture so often, seemed so strange. Flourescent lights flickering, buzzers buzzing, people talking, carts rolling, and the advertising! I was bombarded by messages. "Coors Light!" "Frito Lay!" "Produce!" It was as if I had a small window of how it might feel to a third world citizen coming to the United States for the first time, or how a nun might feel coming out of the convent after thirty years (I just read a book about nuns recommended to me by a friend called Changing Habits, which is what brought this analogy about).

And Costco was even worse for me, when I noticed that my two month olds were enamored by Panasonic Televisions. Not the televisions themselves, but the print ads on the boxes! Suddenly I was realizing how clever those advertisers were in their color choices and product placements.

I realized that these stores, once happy places for me (who doesn't love food?! )was now sort of an obnoxious place. How did my perspective change in one month? It took some time for me to think about, but I realized that I went from being a socialized busybody, working, doctor's appointments, movies, music, computer, dancing, to doing nothing but staring at two essentially non-moving newborn babies. My entire world changed from overstimulation to minutae stimulation. Before I was bombarded by images, noise, and outside information flooding my brainwaves, and now I was seeking information by searching and watching the most primative and basic of movements: an eyelash flutter, eyes opening and closing, arms flapping, lips parting. It was like watching flowers grow.

I like this new "slowing down" me. :-) I find that all of my anxiousness of having to "do" everything and be a productive person in society has kind of slowed down too. And what a relief that is. Anxiety and pressure to not waste time is just a waste of time, I have learned. Why not just enjoy time and quit wasting time worrying about wasting it, I say!

Now that I am back at work, I can feel the tension buidling in my shoulders and back building once again. I see myself outside of my own body, running around my classroom and school like a human tornado, finishing all my tasks at the speed of light, feeling that anxiety and pressure to do everything. But I tell myself that I am rushing for a purpose: so I can get home. And when I get home I do nothing but sit and watch my two little flowers grow.

Four Month Pics-The Real Deal

I have been sitting on these for a month now. These are some of my favorites from their four month "dress up" session. The adorable dresses were provided by "Grandma and Grandpa" Hurwitz.

I can't get this stupid photo to turn the right way! But I just loved Abigail's smile so I had to include it!

Each session, I always look back and think... "I wish I took more of them together!" Or then, I take too many of them together and think, "I wish I got more of them on their own..." Even though their faces are doing different things, the photo below, is just ~presh-us!~ They always hold hands when eating, and for them to hold hands during the pictures was a chance for me to share with you all their physical bond, that I get to witness everyday. I wish I got more of that moment!

The individual pics....I call her Bellie or Bells. Charles calls her Banana Bell. In her fourth month, Annabelle was a sweetheart. Always giving her gummy smile, reflective, and observant as always, laughing and patiently waiting for sister or mommy or daddy.

BANANA BELL

Peaceful Annabelle...

Love the eyelashes and smile in this one. Plus the hand is classic Annabelle. She is fixated on those hands!

Finally she looked up. She can be very much in her own world.

What a poser!

The individual pics....I call her Doodle (pronounced Doo-Dull) and Charles calls her Doodle Bug. As the girls started responding to their names more we realized that poor Abigail rarely responded to Abigail. She always responded to Doodle. Uh-oh. What poor child wants to write Doodle on their kindergarten papers? We've got to practice calling her Abigail or Abby more often. (But she's such a Doodle!)

DOODLE BUG

"Oh mom! This whole dressing up thing is so....old-fashioned." Notice the hands clasped together. I learned that this is considered a developmental milestone for this month.

I love this closed-eyed laugh!

Classic Abigail. She has these eyes that just peer into your soul.
The nanny noticed that the first day she met the girls.

This picture reminds me of a picture of my little sister Hayley. I remember Hayley wearing this pink "Indian" dress and having the same angel face, same little red-lipped pout. Very cute.

Don't you love these girls!!!

Daycare Drama

Since March, we have been exploring all of our daycare options.

There is only one institutionalized daycare facility that accepts infants in our town. We checked them out early on, before I even gave birth. They seemed really nice, but I realized why there is only one place that takes infants, and that's because infants seem sort of out of place in institutionalized care. They are snotty and crawling all over each other, napping in cribs lined up against the wall. While I can appreciate this type of care for preschoolers, I felt like our four month olds needed to be in a more home-like environment.

We talked to my mom about the possibility of her moving up from Orange County to be the nanny, but after months of going back and forth, the logistics of moving up here (job and home) were too difficult to overcome.

We got a referral through my teaching job for a woman who was starting a home day care. Her husband is a teacher in the district so we made an appointment and visited her house. She was sweet, somewhat shy, but had early childhoood education experience (she worked at the instiutionalized care place among other child care facilities) and seemed very organized. We put down a deposit with her.

Then through the twins club in our town, we were referred to a nanny with high recommendations. She was young, but experienced, CPR certified, and had some great references. But then one of her references didn't check out, and told us that the nanny had been calling in sick alot (she felt due to partying). We were scheduled to meet with her the next day so we planned to confront her about it and see what her response was. But when she called in sick the next day, we knew we wouldn't be able to rely upon her.

Finally, we realized that the in-home care lady seemed like the best shot. So I called her to see if she remembered our schedule, and still had us on the books. We hadn't been in touch in over a month so I thought it would be good to check in. But when we called her to check in, the number was disconnected! What the heck?! (She cashed our deposit! I am still trying to track her down!)

With two weeks left until I needed to go to work, I started to panic! Then an old friend from my previous job at The Oxbow School told me that her nanny was cleaning houses and was looking for part-time work to supplement her income. She used this nanny for four years, she was reliable, kind, energetic and in fact she still used her to babysit her 9-year old this year! The only thing was, that she doesn't speak much English. We interviewed her with some friends as translators, and loved her.  She happens to live right in our neighborhood and was very excited to be around the girls. When I asked her if she was interested in this kind of work, she replied, "This is not work! This is fun!"

I have always wanted to be fluent in Spanish (this is a great way to practice!), and I hoped that my kids would also be fluent in more than one language. Therefore, it seemed like a good fit. So we hired her. Phew!

I am still looking into other nannies to use as babysitters in case we need extra days or nights as meetings, Back To School Nights and extra classes start to creep into my schedule. Here I go! Foray into the work force once again...

Professional Pics

Our wonderful "grandparents" Jeanette and Michael paid for professional pictures of our new little family back in May when the girls were only about a month old! We got some great pics of the girls, of Jeanette and Michael and of the girls' great grandparents. What a treasure! Some of the pics of Charles and I are a little dorky, but I love them all nonetheless. I thought I would share some of these pics with you all!

It is so crazy to look back now and see how little and skinny they were. They seemed so big to me then! Your perspective changes when you see them grow in front of your own eyes.

Go to:
http://www.kristysphotos.com/


When you go to the website, click the Access Gallery link and enter in the access code below:

Access code: novella

After you do that, you will be able to view these pictures. If you are using Internet Explorer, you have to go to “page” on the toolbar, and click “compatibility view.” Then it will let you see the larger thumbnails.

Enjoy!

Four Months Old-Practice Pics

I am experimenting more with my little Canon camera and found that even though I use the portrait setting, and even though that setting was put on "kids and pets" (I am assuming to work better with jerky movements) that it still doesn't focus on the girls' faces when I am up close. Instead it always seems to focus on the background material, like the blankets. This drives me insane!

So this time, I used the macro setting, usually used for flower petals, leaves, and sand crystals. I found that I got more pictures that were focused on the face than before. So for now, until I get my dream camera, this will have to do. Regardless of these issues, I think have some pretty great pictures of the girls thus far so I can't be too picky.

I have struggled to find the best lighting in the house, even when it's day time and I use extra incandescant light. So I decided to do the shoot out on our patio, using indirect sunlight. It seemed to be the best lighting so far with far less shadows. But before I went to town, I wanted to do some test shots.

As Abigail slept in the stroller, Bellie was my subject. She wasn't very excited about it at first.

This is the Bellie we know and love. She is just a sincere little girl.

By the end, she was cooing, hooting and talking it up!

Then Abra-doodle woke up so I practiced on her. Sleepy girl.

One of my favorite shots. What a flirt!

Ms. Personality!